The 1 Thing I Hate to Share
Let’s grab coffee! How’s next week?I’d love to pick your brain; can you get together this week? Lunch is on me!Can I get 5 minutes of your time today or tomorrow?Can you put this monthly meeting on your calendar for the next few months to make sure you can join us? You’ll love it, I promise!Phone calls, texts, emails all requesting my time. Daily occurrences. Nice requests. Generous(?) offers to buy me a $4 coffee (which I don’t drink) or maybe lunch. Depending on the day, I read these requests in not such a positive way:Can you take 2 hours out of your day, away from your priorities, other commitments, to meet with me? I NEED you!I like to help people. I think about other’s needs and how I can add value to them. It's in my nature, and in my name.And yet, these days, as a business owner, a mother (i.e.: chauffeur, chef, and at times punching bag) my time is my most precious commodity. It’s not one that I can expand. A few years ago, I asked my cousin what he wanted for his birthday. ‘Not something you can give me. I desperately need more time in my day.’Yes, don’t we all? A simple request.We can’t build more time in the day. Or can we?Working with my coach (yes, coaches have coaches) I realized I can create more time in my day, week, and month.And here’s the secret…Setting Boundaries.The easy part is setting them. The hard part is enforcing them. I find myself still at times saying, ‘Just this once I’ll speak to a client on a Friday.’ And at times that is OK if I am traveling or taking time off.It’s not simply about creating more time in my day. In fact, I realized when I stick to my boundaries, I am creating space in my brain. Space to think creatively, problem solve, research new content, learn something new. I up my game.And when I come off the wagon and my boundaries are completely ignored, I am not at my best. I don’t engage and connect as well with my audience. I am forgetful. I miss mistakes. I don’t listen as well to the stories of the important folks in my world.Oprah says the combination of Preparation and Opportunity creates Luck. Opportunities are at my doorstep. Without boundaries, I don’t have the other piece of the equation, Preparation.All great reasons to keep these boundaries:
- Trainings and meetings with clients and prospects 2 days/week
- 1 meeting or call on Mondays
- No meetings or calls on Fridays
It takes significant effort and focuses to stick to them. But that doesn’t always work. A client will request I 
conduct a training on a Monday. I am offered a great opportunity to speak to my ideal audience on Friday. When that happens, I make exceptions that work for me. Not others. My priorities stay at the top.Thank you for the invitation to lunch and coffee. I really like connecting with others and building relationships. I also love being with the people that matter most to me. In order to do that, to prioritize them, to prioritize ME, I need to schedule time with you next month. Thanks for understanding!What boundaries do you need to set to keep your sanity?
